


Ugly yellow love notes

by fueled_galaxies



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Fluff, M/M, One Shot, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-03
Updated: 2018-10-03
Packaged: 2019-07-24 14:35:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,801
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16177076
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fueled_galaxies/pseuds/fueled_galaxies
Summary: Sehun reminisces on the days of his and Luhan's little forever





	Ugly yellow love notes

**Author's Note:**

> Wrote it on a whim last summer.  
> Selu still gives me strong fluff feels

 

_Tap… Tap… Tap…_

  
Sehun traces the droplets of rain slowly running down from the window. Eyes darting on the vast little garden they have in the backyard. He admires the little glow the grass has due to the soft afternoon drizzle.

He strokes the blonde haired person sleeping on his lap. Letting his hand ran through his soft hair, calming him as he moves a little from his sleep. Sehun admires the calmness Luhan had. Soft eyes closed, looking so serene and peaceful. He traces the creases he has on his forehead, all calming down with every soft touch Sehun was doing. He traces Luhan’s nose. Perfect shaped and everything. He admires his eyes that illuminate perfection even if they’re close. Those soft cheeks with just that perfect tint of redness to show the glow he has. And lastly he traces over Luhan’s lips. Perfectly soft pink lips that just makes Sehun love him from all over.

Luhan squirms a little as he felt Sehun playing with his face. Sehun chuckles and continues running his hand through the blonde hair to ease him.

“Hmmm.” Luhan hums as he moved.

“Sleep more. It’s still raining outside.”

“It’s so sad we can’t go out and play today.” Luhan mutters, eyes still closed.

“It’s okay though, you’re tired anyway, you need rest so just sleep.”

“Hmm.” He moves around a little before slowly settling on his earlier sleeping position. Sehun continues to ran his hand through the latter’s hair.

Times like these, Sehun thinks everything is just perfect; that he has everything he could ever wish for. There’s something about staying like this with Luhan that he thinks everything played out well. He feels satisfied.

He doesn’t need anything more, just him and Luhan, everything is complete.

It's really an odd thing to say coming from a 25 year old

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

 

 

The first time they met, there weren’t those sparks and sudden realizations of love or anything. It was just plain and simple as if unimportant. Sehun had to blame Jongin for it though, but he was more of grateful for it really. Luhan might not have those sparks or anything, but Sehun sure had something going on, like a little fire waiting to burst into flames.

“Hey Sehun” the taller looks up from his plate of chicken, stopping mid-air before taking a bite.

“What?”

“Can you just please save me from my misery” Sehun raises his brow, staring at a grain of rice stuck on Jongin’s lip.

“Huh?"

“I mean look at it this way.” Jongin dabs his mouth with a napkin. “You could save the earth if you start walking up to him right at this very moment. You eliminate one dumb person from the universe.”

“What are you talking about? You’re being weird again.” Sehun finally took a bite of his food. Cafeteria food just never really taste like anything.

“You look awfully terrible and creepy just looking from afar really. Like seriously, you have no balls.” Sehun hissed as he flicks rice on his friend.

“I don’t understand what you’re saying. Can you talk normally for a sec?” Sehun attempts to take a bite again, but stopped midway. “Don’t tell me it’s that time of the month again.”

Now it was Jongin’s time to throw something at him, and he decided for a piece of carrot.

“You’re such a kid for throwing a carrot.”

“Well who started with rice? Now its stuck in my hair.” Sehun laughed as he watch Jongin’s hair get bushier.

“But seriously though, are you on to something? Like should I make a run for it?”

“No. Ugh I was talking about Lu--.” Sehun immediately shushed him up by placing his hand on his friend’s mouth.

“How many times have I told you to shut up about that.”

Jongin struggled to remove Sehun’s hand from his mouth, therefore leaving him no choice but licking it to which Sehun reacted violently and bashed his head.

“What you do that for!?” Jongin was massaging his head.

“It was your fault. Why the hell did you lick my palm? You’re so gross.” Sehun continued wiping it with a tissue.

“Ugh because you don’t get what I’m trying to say. Don’t you want me to set you up with him?” This got Sehun’s attention.

“And how are you obviously going to do that? You suck at the matchmaking thing. Have you forgot about pairing Jongdae hyung with Kris hyung?”

“Please don’t remind me of that. I am still very much apologetic to Kris hyung about it. But this one’s different I swear.” Jongin muttered, face starting to form a grin.

“That’s because?” Sehun trailed off

“Because I’m a hundred percent sure that at least one of you likes the other one by a mile.”

“And your point is?” Sehun stared at him.

“Look at it this way, at least I have some sort of connection to Luhan hyung compared to you. We have soccer for that.”

“I still don’t believe that you’re on the same team as him.” Sehun snorted.

“That’s because you never go to one fucking game you ass.”

Sehun flopped on the side and laughed.

“You’re so stupid I’m just trying to help you have a lovelife already.” Jongin faked a sob.

“But I’m fine with it. Well okay no, not right now that I find him really _really_ interesting okay. There I said it.”

Jongin dropped his spoon and proceeded for a slow clap. Sehun made a face.

 

“Finally fucking admitting it.”

“I never said I didn’t like him.”

“Well you never really said you liked him either.” Sehun sighed

“Ugh whatever. So what do you suggest mister matchmaker?”

“So, why don’t you watch the game tomorrow and maybe you could start from there.”

 

Somehow, Sehun was still questioning himself why he’s sitting in the bleachers with a bucket of popcorn in his hands. It’s not like he’s going to cheer on Jongin like any other good best friend out there. He’d rather flop in his couch and play video games all day rather than watch Jongin being all proud of himself with girls squealing all over. He’s still contemplating if he should just ditch this.

Then the referee signals with a whistle and then all came the players.

There in front walked Jongin looking proud of himself as always. He was looking for Sehun then waved at him when their eyes met. The squeals of the girls behind Sehun was so loud that he thought his ears would bleed.  They probably thought Jongin waved at them. How pitiful it would be for Sehun to burn their hopes and dreams of getting a smile from Jongin all come falling down. Why Jongin was the most popular one at school, that will always be a mystery for Sehun.

Then the other players tail behind Jongin, their captain, then a certain blonde caught Sehun’s attention.

Maybe he already found the reason why he’s watching this game in the first place. It probably might turn out to not be stupid after all.

 

Their team ended up winning that game, there was no surprise there especially when Jongin was in such a good mood. Turns out, Kyungsoo was watching too.

Sehun joined Kyungsoo in the field while waiting for Jongin.

A few moments passed and Jongin emerged from the back room dragging a smiling Luhan with him.

“Hey” Jongin smiled. Giving Sehun a quick high five before giving Kyungsoo a quick hug.

Sehun just stood there, eyes darting everywhere as he squirmed awkwardly.

“Oh right I forgot.” Jongin let go of Kyungsoo and pointed at Luhan. “Luhan hyung, this is Kyungsoo. Well you already know who he is. And this is Sehun, my awkward squirming best friend.” Jongin smirked as Sehun just stood there unmoving.

“Hi Kyungsoo. Nice seeing you again.” Luhan smiled. “And nice meeting you, I’m Luhan.” Luhan reached his arm for a shake and Sehun just stared at it.

Jongin nudged Sehun a to let him come back to his senses.

“Huh?” Then Sehun notices the hand. He grabs it quickly. “Oh! I’m sorry. I’m Sehun by the way.” Sehun could feel his cheeks heat up and he thinks he probably looks stupid right now.

Sehun swears he could feels sparks and electricity bolting from his body the moment Luhan’s hand touched his.

Wait, did he just put himself in a fucking sentence with Luhan?

The gods must have put him out of his misery already. Sehun was dancing like an apple in his mind right now, bouncing off the wall and being so damn perky he would put the sun to shame.

 

“So you guys wanna eat or something?” Jongin asked. Sehun cursing him so much in his head right now. How dare he ruin his little apple victory dance.

“S’okay with me.” Kyungsoo said.

“Yeah sure.” Sehun agreed.

“Oh, I can’t.” Sehun can’t help but see his expectation drop. “I’m meeting up with Minseok for some pizza.” Sehun could hear all his hopes and dreams with Luhan come crashing down.

“Ow, well that’s too bad.” Jongin glanced at Sehun. “Maybe next time then?”

“Definitely. Well I gotta go. It was nice meeting you Sehun.” Luhan smiled and Sehun swears he probably looks so stupid right now with his little grin.

 

Maybe his little hope and dream is kinda alive though.

 

 

 

  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

 

 

It’s after 3 months when Sehun met Luhan on his own accord.

He had been profusely ignoring Jongin’s pleas (more like death threats actually) to watch another soccer game, but Sehun had been firm on rejecting every single one of them.

Sehun was face palming his self mentally so much that afternoon. His mom was nagging at him to bring an umbrella since the weather reported of heavy rains this afternoon. Who knows the rain would be this heavy. Jongin already went off hours ago since Kyungsoo promised to go to a movie with him. That left Sehun to be tortured all alone in trigonometry for 2 hours while Jongin was already stealthily ditching class.

Sehun refused to run to the bus stop that was 3 blocks away from the school gate, plus he was a lazy ass to run for it, and he doesn’t want to get his new shoes all wet, his mom would kill him for it. So he had no choice but to sit at the waiting shed until the rain stopped.

“Hey”

Sehun just stared at the rain creating a puddle at the foot of the stairs

“Hey, Sehun right?” Sehun turned around and came face to face with a pair of legs. He looked up and was greeted by a smiling Luhan.

“Oh.” He immediately stood up. “Luhan hyung, Hi.”

“What are you doing here alone? Did Jongin leave you or something?”

“Oh, well technically yes. He left 2 hours ago, he’s on a movie date with Kyungsoo.” Sehun fidgeted, and kind of smiled as he watched Luhan stare at the rain.

“Oh I see. So why aren’t you going home yet?” Sehun pointed at the rain. “Don’t have an umbrella?”

Sehun nodded. “I didn’t know the weather forecast was so accurate when it said serious heavy rains.”

“You should’ve brought one really.”

“Yeah I should’ve.”

It became quiet for a minute before Luhan started talking again.

“Hey, how come I haven’t seen you in games anymore?” They both watched the rain drip from the ends of the leaves near the door.

“Oh, well I’ve been busy. Sorry.” No he wasn’t busy. He was just too afraid to strike up another coversation with Luhan to be honest.

“Well that’s too bad. We never got to go out to dinner with Jongin and Kyungsoo.”

“Yeah. It’s a shame really. ” Sehun made a face, mentally cursing himself for being so scared.

“Maybe after exams we could go out for that dinner maybe?” Luhan smiles. Sehun could feel his heart skipped a beat

“That would be cool.”

Let’s just say that that night, all Jongin could hear at the end of the phone was limitless stories of Sehun on how perfect and nice Luhan was.

 

 

Sehun was sure he admired Luhan.

Admiration was a strong word for him, something like he would rarely use, and would feel really, but it was amazing he felt really strong about it to Luhan.

There was a thousand reason why he admired Luhan.

He doesn’t know why his personality would change all of a sudden when Luhan’s around. How his heart would beat faster than usual. The way his eyes dart everywhere and would refuse to rest on Luhan’s twinkling eyes. How nervous he gets that his lips run dry and he couldn’t stop fidgeting. Only Luhan could have that effect on him. Just him.

Sehun can’t explain it, but he feels extra special when Luhan’s around, even though he feels like he’s jumping off a cliff every time their eyes meet.

Sehun was just too happy that he already passed that awkward stage with Luhan. Now he could even hold real conversations with him without spacing out like some kind of weird human being. Now he doesn’t need to peek at his classroom (okay he only did it twice when he wanted to know what class he was from) just to see him. And the main fact that Luhan already knows Sehun exists is enough for the younger to do his little victory apple dance in his mind.

It was just the way Luhan held himself. Like he didn’t look like he was a senior at all, someone that was a year older than Sehun. How approachable he was and smart and funny  and cute (no he is gorgeous) and all those positive things. Like how he never failed to smile at everyone who greets him at the hall. Taking small glances at those waving at him everytime during a game. The way he carries himself as a person that even Sehun forgets that Luhan was so great at soccer (it doesn’t go together with the way he looks really). 

All he knows is that he feels extra special when Luhan’s doe eyes and smile pops in his mind.

 

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

 

 

It takes two years later when they meet again. Sehun said it was fate or some sort of destiny, but Jongin gladly pointed out it was just him being stupid and clueless.

Sehun was walking aimlessly at the field of his university that he didn’t see the ball coming at him and knocking all his things.

He groaned as he picked up his folder and his plates for his drawing class.

“Thank god the grass not’s wet.” Sehun told himself as he rolled all of them up and placed them inside the tube. He did not give up his sleep last night just to pass wet floor plans to his professor.

“I am so sorry for that.” Sehun thought the voice sounded familiar, but brushed it off as he continued picking up his things.

He looked up once he finished fixing his things again.

Sehun gaped at him.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” Sehun took his notebook that Luhan was handing out to him.

“I’m f-fine. Thank you.” He dusted off his clothes, he stared at him to check if he remembers him or not. Sehun thought it was an apparition or something.

“You sure? You definitely should be more careful. You were walking in the middle of the field.”

“I’m sorry. I didn’t notice.” Sehun immediately bowed and started walking away.

“Hey” He turned around. “It was nice seeing you again Sehun.

Cue in a stupid grinning Sehun around here.

 

Sehun was sure he did not know Luhan was also attending the same university as he is. He kind of gave up on him after he graduated. He finished about 2 tubs of ice cream for that, trying to forget his first unrequited love by indulging in sappy romantic chick flicks. Jongin laughed at him, but kind of understood where Sehun was coming from. That’s why Sehun decided to just forget about Luhan and maybe try to find new love during his university years.

Seeing Luhan just changes everything. Just when he’s actually prepared to find someone else, Luhan just decides to pop out of nowhere and mix up Sehun’s already confused heart. He was already on the verge of agreeing to all that blind dates Jongin was setting him up with, but then here comes Luhan to steal his heart once again. He’s just sneaky, and basically reclaims his position on Sehun’s heart.

 

It was probably awkward and nerve wrecking at the same time but Sehun finally garnered up the courage he needs to get close with Luhan. He doesn’t even know what came over him that day, he just found himself walking to the older’s classroom and asking him to go get some ice cream. It didn’t took him long enough to be a permanent friend of Luhan despite the difference in majors and year levels. These are the times Sehun finds out how different Luhan really is compared to the image he has of him on his mind.

He doesn’t fret over when he discovers how ‘manly’ Luhan really was. Beneath all those athletic abilities and tough guy image, is just a naïve guy who’s afraid of heights and almost everything that moves in the dark. How Luhan turned out to be the guy that would pick food over anything else and would refuse to leave the table without dessert.  Sehun can’t help but admire Luhan more because of this.

Luhan was the type to randomly crack a joke when he sees you having a bad day. He’d eventually drag you to the arcade for a round of shooting hoops then eating ice cream until you’re both bloated, and eventually walking all the way back to your apartment because you’ve got no money left to take a bus home. He’d be too lazy to do home works and term papers but ending up being on top of his class.

Sehun admired the little things he saw. He was just glad that Luhan bothered to notice him, to be his friend. Luhan doesn’t know how much it meant for Sehun.

Jongin was glad, seeing how Sehun was being happy despite the visible nervous wreck Sehun was everytime Luhan was there. It took him some time to adjust to the reality that Luhan was becoming part of his life more than he expected. Jongin gave him some key points to which Sehun reacted hesitantly again and leaving the room all red on his face.

Sehun’s just plainly happy that Luhan is there. His plain existence is all that matters.

 

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

 

 

It took Sehun one semester to realize that he might probably have zero chance with Luhan after all.

He was on his way to the cafeteria to meet up with Jongin for lunch when he caught sight of Luhan holding a huge box of pizza. Sehun thought of saying hi to him when he caught sight of Minseok, Luhan’s political science buddy and of course high school friend, tailing behin him carrying a tub of ice cream and some soda.

Sehun just stood there and watch Luhan laugh while Minseok caught up with him. They were smiling  and joking around and that made Sehun sad. He can’t help but compare how Luhan is when he’s with Minseok. This just makes him sad. How could he make Luhan as happy as he is when he’s around Minseok?

Upon seeing this, it resulted to Sehun dragging himself over Jongin’s apartment to mope.

“He’s so out of my league.” Sehun flops his head on the kitchen counter.

“Now come on don’t say that.” Kyungsoo adds, placing a glass of water beside Sehun’s head.

“I am a hundred percent sure this has something to do with Minseok hyung.” Sehun sprang up and look at Jongin. “I’m right, aren’t I?”

“How did you know about that?”

“Because you’re being stupid again Sehun.” Kyungsoo shot him a look. “What?”

“You’re not helping at all Jongin.”

Sehun groans as he tries to erase the image of a laughing Luhan beside Minseok. He’s afraid that they are doomed to be friends from the start and he’s the only one trying to actually develop it into something more. The thought of one wrong move from him can ruin everything he carefully built around him and Luhan.

“Why don’t you just tell him how you feel.” Kyungsoo pointed out.

“I don’t think I can.”

“It’s been years Sehun. Don’t you think it’s time you take a risk for a change?”

He can’t. He might lose Luhan in the process, and that’s something Sehun is a thousand percent sure that he cannot comprehend. It might ruin everything, and he doesn’t want that to happen. He’d rather choose to be the platonic friend rather than be the friend who decided to ruin their friendship because he’s being selfish.

“What are you so afraid of anyways Sehun?” Kyungsoo asked. “Afraid to lose Luhan in the process?”

Sehun nodded.

“Well don’t be. To be happy, you have to take a risk; to be out of your comfort zone.”

“Luhan is worth the risk, isn’t he Sehun?” Jongin asks.

Sehun nods.

“Don’t be afraid to be happy just because you’re thinking you might lose him.” Jongin pats him on the shoulder. “If he’s worth the risk, than you know you’re doing this for your own happiness. Everyone deserves to be happy Sehun, and that includes you.”

But Sehun thinks he can’t be happy if Luhan’s not around really.

 

A week after midterms, Sehun finally gathered the courage to take a risk.

Sehun’s heart was beating fast as he sat at the bubble tea shop near the campus. It’s been two hours since he arrived seeing its half past 3. (He knows he came a bit early). He was feeling anxious as he waits for a furious Luhan to barge into that glass door and laugh at his face.

Sehun has it all planned in his mind right now. The moment Luhan reads that awful yellow note stuck in his math notebook, that Sehun purposely borrowed last night, he’d laugh for a good five minutes before going to the shop and mercilessly breaking Sehun’s heart by friend zoning him. Once Luhan reads that two pages long love confession, it just ends there. Sehun knows it and he’s readying his heart for the cold feeling of rejection to him in the face straight on.

He sees Luhan walking across the street towards the shop. He instantly fidgets and decides to drink his bubble tea all in one go, causing him to choke on the pearls and cough profusely. Some of the customers looked at him, and Chanyeol, tha part time worker slash friend of his, just laughed at him as he shakes his head in Sehun’s stupidity.

The older enters the shop and immediately looks for Sehun. The latter was keeping his head low to avoid getting seen.

“Luhan!” He could hear Chanyeol. Oh crap.  “Sehun’s on last booth at the end.”

The younger could heart his heart thumping out of his chest right now, palms sweating and everything.

Luhan finally comes up to him and takes a sit across.

This is it, he’s going to get the biggest rejection in his life, let alone in a public place. Fancy that.

“H-Hi hyung.” Sehun curses on his voice stammering like a weakling right now.

Luhan places the yellow note on the table. Sehun gapes at him.

“You know I hate yellow.” Luhan says flatly.

“Oh. It totally slipped my mind, I’m sorry.” Sehun was about to grab the note but Luhan’s hand beat him to it.

“But…” Sehun looks up. “It doesn’t mean I hate what’s written on it.”

“So you acknowledge it?” Sehun whispers. He might be pushing his luck a little too much.

Luhan smiles and Sehun thinks he’s probably losing his mind right now.

(Plus he found out Minseok was already dating someone else when Luhan laughed at him for getting all mopey about it.)

 

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

 

 

Despite his lack of experience and probably his young age, Sehun is sure he understands what it feels like to be in love, like to be really _in love._

It was the way a single smile could brighten up his day. It started out as platonic admiration that grew into something more.

It was around the time he was lost on his first day to his new high school. He just moved into Seoul and everything felt so foreign. He had his class schedule in hand and was looking fast for the biology room. His class was about to start in 10 minutes.

He was already giving up and just decided to sulk in front of his locker when a medium toned voice awoke him from his misery.

“Hi, are you lost or something?” He looked up and saw a blonde figure smiling at him.

“K-Kinda.” He stammers for a while. “I can’t find the biology lab. I’m new.”

“Oh, that’s next to the chemistry lab. I have my class there. You could go with me.” He smiled and Sehun thinks it’s brilliant.

“Thanks.”

“No problem.” He smiles again. “I’m Luhan by the way.”

“Oh Sehun.” Sehun feels his heart doing this little flip.

 

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

 

 

 

It’s the way he feels comfortable. The way he could be himself around Luhan and not think if he’s doing the right thing or not. He wasn’t afraid of not being perfect all the time because Luhan liked the way he is, all awkward and clumsy.

It was during their first date and everything was going wrong in so many ways. It started raining mid-afternoon so his plan to go to the outdoor amusement park was set aside. The restaurant reservation he made was scrapped out because  a guy rented out the whole place for his proposal that night. All his plans put into waste and it just leaves him and Luhan with a bucket of popcorn watching some animated film at the cinema. He was apologizing the whole time that Luhan had to shove a handful of popcorn on his mouth to stop him.

“Will you stop apologizing already? I said it was fine. So would you just watch the movie with me?” Sehun nods and munches on his food.

“I kinda like this.” Luhan starts. “Not so fancy, just a typical awkward first date like everyone has.”

Sehun can’t help but smile and thinks everything’s going perfectly.

“But seriously, you could’ve picked out a better movie. I’m not a kid to be watching cartoons right now Sehun.” Well maybe he could’ve improved on that aspect.

 

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

 

 

It was how he felt squeamish and awfully nervous with little amount of contact him and Luhan shared. Every touch sends millions of electric bolts in Sehun’s body. He can’t quite actually pin point if he’s enjoying it or just simply amazed by how every little touch and stare Luhan does, it always makes him weak on the knees.

It was probably around their fifth date. The rain had stopped hours ago, with all the pavements having visible traces of water. The leaves were dropping little droplets of water as the cold autumn air was blowing that night. Sehun dropped by the field after Luhan’s soccer game and dragged the latter for late night pizza. They lost and Luhan was moping around because Sehun didn’t cheer for him because he was busy drawing sticks and stuff again. Sehun just laughed and said he’ll just buy him food and that totally made Luhan grin like a five year old.

They were already on their way back to Luhan’s apartment, a couple of blocks down from Sehun’s.

Sehun was walking slower and a little bit  at the back. He watched Luhan walk infront of him, watching the moonlight give him some little spotlight. Sehun was too busy watching the older that he tripped on his own two feet. He fell on his butt and Luhan had to turn around to see what happened.

“Are you okay?” Luhan crouched down and poked at the younger. He was obviously stopping himself from bursting into fits of laughter.

“Are you seriously worried? Because I can see you laughing any moment now.” Sehun deadpanned; rubbing his elbow and hip. That was the signal for Luhan to laugh loudly. Hitting Sehun’s arm here and there as he continues to laugh. Sehun was smiling too as he watched Luhan having fun mocking me.

“Okay I’m good. Get up.” He pulled Sehun up as he carried his backpack.

Sehun dusted of his pants, and still was rubbing his butt.

“Are you sure you’re okay? What are you doing tripping on mid air huh?”

“I’m fine.” Sehun snorts. “You’re just going to laugh at me again”

Luhan giggles and he instantly laced his hand with Sehun’s.

“See? You should hold my hand when we walk so you don’t end up looking stupid like that again.”

His palms might be a litle clammy right now, but the feeling of Sehun’s hand fitting perfectly between Luhan’s fingers just feels perfect.

 

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

 

 

There’s those little things that reminds him how amazing and fun it feels to be in love, and to be with that someone that you know just loves you the way you love them. Those random times that when he’s feeling so frustrated in class because he can’t do the draft right, he instantly gets a message from Luhan telling him how his day went. Little stories of how they managed to make a bonfire of all their readings and hand-outs for class to ditch their midterms. It makes Sehun smile and just forget all those frustrations and insecurities he feels.

“I just can’t do this anymore.” Sehun complains, letting his head drop on the table, disregarding the pencil he was holding.

“Cheer up, you’re like a half way there.” Luhan says. “And you draw awesome. I could only draw stick figures.”

Sehun chuckles. “But this is too hard.”

“Nothing really is easy Sehun. Come on you have like the whole night for it.” Luhan smiles. “Besides I’ll be here.”

He gives Sehun a little peck on the lips before settling on the couch again. Sehun just nods and begins doing his designs once again.

 

But there are those times that he feels he’s not good enough though.

It happened one afternoon. Luhan texted him earlier that he was out with his soccer team mates for a victory party. He wanted Sehun to catch up so he could finally meet them. Sehun replied that it might be awkward, but Luhan assured him that Jongin was there so he need not fret.

He was running a little late. He had to finish three housing drafts before he left campus. He arrived at the restaurant 10 minutes later. He could see Luhan with his friends, laughing and eating and playing games. He watched Luhan be so carefree and confident with all of them. Sehun felt intimidated as he watched them. They looked so different from him (except for Jongin of course). He sees himself like a world apart from where Luhan is, like he’s not even supposed to be in the same place Luhan was. Like every team member of Luhan looked perfect and they just fit together as a group. How did a little squid like him manage to squeeze in to Luhan’s life anyways?

Like he shouldn’t be the one Luhan is spending all these time with.

The older sees him from the glass and instantly waves at him, telling his friends he’ll just get Sehun. He gaves him a short smile as he played with the pebbles on the side.

“Hey, why didn’t you just go in?” Luhan asks, trying to catch Sehun’s eyes that was refusing to look at him.

“Nothing. I just got here.” He said, a little shaky.

“They why don’t you come in? They’re waiting for you.”

“Are you sure? I’m fine with waiting outside really”

Luhan sighs, he looks back at his friends.

“Well I’m fine with waiting outside too.” Sehun looked up at him, a little smile greets him.

“Now don’t say that. Its your victory party. You should be in there with them. I’m fine here.” Sehun said “I’ll trace dirt or something.” Luhan laughs at his attempt.

“Seriously? I’d rather be with you here than go back in with them.” He rubs Sehun’s cheeks. “What’s wrong? There’s something you’re not telling me.”

Sehun drops his bags and sits on the pavement, Luhan followed after.

“You’ll think this is extremely stupid” Luhan looks at him. “Alright fine. It’s just.. Ugh”

“Oh come on tell me.”

“itsjustifeelalittleinsecurearoundthemokay.” Sehun says in one go. Luhan hits him. “Ow.”

“I understood that.” Sehun gapes at him. “Isn’t it enough that I’m with you?” Luhan immediately laced his fingers with Sehun.

“It’s not that. I’m a thousand percent sure about us.”

“Then that’s all you’ll ever need,” Luhan pecks him on the cheek.

Maybe it was how Luhan made him happy that day that he just can’t help but cling on him after that.

 

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

 

 

Despite all those little things, he knows why he stays in love. Why he thinks he’s probably the happiest man to have Luhan around him.

He didn’t realize it but he’s spending less and less time in his apartment but in Luhan’s rather. How he would immediately go straight to Luhan’s instead of his to take a rest. He notices the number of things he starts to leave and the number of clothes he has in Luhan’s closet. How Luhan’s apartment became theirs without him realizing a bit of it. (He ended up leaving his apartment to Chanyeol).

Like the one time he woke up to the sound of pots and pans falling on the cold hard floor and a soft gasp of Luhan cursing. This got him to his senses and immediately went out of bed to grab the nearest weapon he has, just in case a burglar decides to barge in and Luhan was in danger. (he ended up grabbing the pink lampshade on the bedside table.)

“Yah!” He shouts, only greeted by a flustered Luhan clutching his right hand.

Luhan gave him a dead look.

“What are you doing with my lampshade? You know that Jongdae gave that as a gift.”

Sehun, suddenly sensing the situation, hides the lampshade on his back and scratches his head.

“I thought there was a burglar or something. I heard cursing.”

“I’m the only one here.” Luhan points on the equipment on the floor. “I kind of drop these. Sorry.”

Sehun places the lampshade on the floor and walks over to Luhan, picking up the pans in the process.

“What are you doing at 6 in the morning anyways? My class doesn’t start till 9 and your work is not until 8.”

“I was…” Luhan trailed. “I was going to make breakfast.”

Sehun was about to laugh but saw Luhan still clutching his hand.

“What happened to that?” Luhan tried to move his hand away but Sehun immediately caught his wrist.

“It’s nothing. Just a little scratch okay.”

“A little scratch? Hyung it’s bleeding.”

Sehun immediately pulled Luhan’s hand towards the sink and let the cool water run over his bleeding injury.

Luhan hisses a little.

“You’re such a baby.” Sehun chuckles, earning him a pinch from Luhan.

“I am not!” Luhan pouted. “I just wanted to cook breakfast for a change.”

“But you can’t cook to save your life.” He got hit again. “So violent in the morning.

“I said I was trying okay. But I can’t cook now.” Luhan pouted, clutching his bandage wrapped hand.

“Tell you what, let’s not go out today. Just stay in and cook whatever we want to, even though it might end up inedible. How about that?” Sehun smiled.

“But, my work, and your classes.”

“It’s Friday, I think it’s a given already. So?” Luhan smiled at him.

“I’m being such a bad influence on you sometimes.”

“Nah, I think we’re equal.” Sehun gives a quick peck on the cheek before manning over the kitchen.

 

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

 

 

 

Just because it looks like everything is going fine between them, doesn’t mean that they don’t encounter problems once in a while. There are times one complains about something and the other has too much to say about it. They are practically passed the phase of arguing on why did the latter not say I love you back, or why did the other forgot to text him. They were passed the childish bickering and such, and were trying to step forward to a more mature relationship, or so they think.

The last time they fought, it was about the plates Luhan bought that were too expensive to be eating on. This time, it was about the TV.

“Where the hell did my TV go?” Luhan said, still clutching on his bag. He just got home from work.

“Oh, I bought a new one.” Sehun says, emerging from the kitchen with a bowl of pasta.

“I can see that Sehun. But I’m asking where mine is.” He puts his coat on the rack and walks towards the 42 inch TV in the living room.

“I placed it back on the box, where else will I put it?”

“But you never told me that you’re going to buy a new one. We should talk about these things Sehun.”

Sehun groans as he turned off the tv, staring at Luhan who was still tapping his foot on the floor.

“I don’t see the problem here. I just bought a tv, what’s so wrong with that?”

“Because you never consulted me. We live in the same apartment remember, we share things. And that fucking tv was the first thing I bought with my paycheck.” Luhan points out.

“And this TV is the first thing I bought with mine. And the hell with the consulting, like you consulted me with those damn plates you bought.” Sehun remarks. “How much were those again?”

“$80 for a set. They’re an investment. And don’t fucking bring that up again. We already settled that.”

“You’re being unreasonable Luhan. I just bought a tv, I don’t see why you have to bitch like this” Sehun’s voice started rising

“Because you don’t buy things when we already have one that works perfectly fine!”

“It’s my money okay. I can spend it on anything I want to. Just be happy I didn’t buy something stupid with it”

“This is not about you and your money Sehun, its about compromise, which you totally don’t understand!” Luhan stomps his feet and slams the door as he enters their bedroom.

He flops on the bed and groans profusely on the pillow. He lets himself calm down, until he peaks out of the comforter and notices his TV placed on the table in front of the bed.

After careful thought and curses to himself, he walks out of the bedroom and sees Sehun taking out the box again and reading the manual how to disassemble the TV. Luhan walks over to him and wraps his arms around the younger’s waist.

“Alright fine, I’m taking it back to the store if it makes us stop arguing.” Sehun says. He feels Luhan shaking his head.

“No no, you bought it. We should use it. We’ll just let the old one stay in the bedroom.” Luhan smiles.

Sehun rotates so he could face Luhan and kisses his forehead. Luhan calms down and buries his face settles his nose on the crook of Sehun’s neck.

“We should really stop fighting over things like this.” Sehun says.

“Agreed”

But they manage to bicker over the toaster the next month.

 

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

 

 

 

Luhan had this amazing ability of being able to put up with everything Sehun has to throw at him. He picks up little things that Sehun is more than grateful that Luhan understands. Luhan never questions the nights Sehun would go home a little late than usual because of the design demands his boss has been throwing at him. He is always greeted by a smiling Luhan asking him how his day went with a cup of hot chocolate to help him ease up. Luhan is always there to listen to every bit of complain he has and how he wishes he could get a less demanding job. (Luhan just makes him understand he’s in his dream one right now).

 

“I just feel so tired. I just want to quit, find a new venture.” Sehun complains over dinner one day.

“If you quit, do you already have one waiting?” Luhan answers briefly.

“No, but I could look for one. I’m still young, I could probably find one in a heartbeat.” Sehun smiles.

“Yes, and so as the millions of fresh college graduates. They’re much younger Sehun, they’d get the opportunity more.”

“I don’t care. I have more experience. I could compete.” He nods. “Yeah I could do that.”

“Then new ones can’t get you. It’s going to be hard instilling new things on you when you’re already used to something else.” Sehun makes a face.

“You just don’t want to me quit because I’ll flop around the house all day.”

“That, and I know you love what you’re doing.”

Sehun smiles and feels his heart do that thing it does when Luhan makes a point.

 

 

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

 

 

 

No matter how busy the two of them might get due to their career expectations.; Sehun working in a architectural firm and Luhan as a legal adviser, they make sure to fill in the gaps of each other. They make sure to have time just for themselves, a little moment where they’ll disregard every electronic device they own and just drive out somewhere far and get themselves lost for a while.

“Do you even know where we’re going?” Luhan asks, lowering the volume of the car stereo. “Last week we got so lost in Gyeonggi-do we had to call Baekhyun to get back.”

“We’re fine, we’re not that lost anyways. That’s the point of the whole trip hyung, actually discovering some new place.”

“But I don’t want to be too lost. What if we don’t find the way back?” Luhan starts to panick.

“Just calm down, we’ll be able to come back okay so just enjoy the scene change. You’re sick of the city already.”

Luhan calms down and just opens the car window.

(He ended up loving the trip and loving their new found place in the end of Ilsan too much that he promised to buy a piece of land there to build a new house.)

 

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

 

 

 

But compared to everything that they had gone through, Sehun had never felt tired of expressing how much Luhan just meant to him. He won’t get tired of letting the older remember that he’s the main reason why Sehun has been having the best life so far.

Luhan was the same. He might not be as showy as Sehun is when it comes to affection, but he loves him too much. He feels like sometimes Sehun loves him too much, that maybe the younger might feel that he doesn’t give the same amount, if not more, back to him. Luhan just wanted to let Sehun feel that he’s basically the reason why everything seems so perfect in his life.

And nothing was more memorable than Sehun’s 24th birthday.

 

It fell on a Saturday and Luhan was apologizing the whole night before that he had this big meeting the next day. He said he would miss cooking breakfast for him and will be back late at night because of the meeting. Sehun said he understands and would probably just go out with a couple of his friends.

Sehun called up Jongin that day, he just came back from a trip with Kyungsoo, he asked if they wanted to go out but they said they had to cancel since Kyungsoo’s still suffering from jet lag. Sehun was disappointed and ended up flopping around the house the whole day.

A little after 6 and someone was knocking profusely on the door. Sehun dropped the remote and walked to the door. A panting Chanyeol came into view.

“Chanyeol hyung? I thought you were in Busan or something.” Sehun greets, ushering the seemingly tired Chanyeol to come inside to sit on the couch as he grabs a glass of water at the kitchen.

“I just…. I came back yesterday.” He was still catching his breathe. “Man no one told me your elevator was broken.” He complained, Sehun gave him a glass of water.

“What are you doing here?” Sehun sits on a chair beside the couch. “Luhan won’t be back till later, he has this big meeting.” Sehun frowns.

“I know. He sent me here.” Chanyeol deadpans, drinking his water.

“Sent you here? Why?” Sehun’s eyes makes a little glimmer.

“It’s your birthday stupid, of course he has something planned.” He grins. “Now go get ready then we’ll leave in 10,”  

 

Sehun settles on a white button shirt that Luhan simply loves on him along with black pants. He sits on the back seat when he sees Baekhyun grinning on him from the front seat.

“Okay what is happening?” Sehun asks, Baekhyun smiles at him.

“It’s a secret. Luhan hyung sure bothered all of us for this.” Chanyeol laughs.

“Should I be afraid?”

“No, but you might want to relax your heart for a bit.”

The drive wasn’t that long. Sehun was too busy singing along to the tunes Chanyeol was playing on his car, which turned out to be all of his favorite songs. (Luhan made sure to let Chanyeol download every sappy love song there was)

They stopped at a nearby park and Sehun doesn’t know what’s happening but Baekhyun suddenly went out of the car and went to open his side of the door.

“What are you doing?” Baekhyun was asking him to turn around as he placed a blindfold on him.

“Don’t even think about taking that off”

“Are we here yet?”

“Nope. A little more then we’ll be there.” Chanyeol explains. “You’ll spoil the surprise if you find out where we’re headed to.”

Sehun groans and he feels the car driving out again.

A few minutes passed and he feels the car stopping. He sits there still and waits for Baekhyun to usher him out of the car. He instructs Sehun to step there, climb up there, move here and there.

“Just relax, you’ll have fun.” Baekhyun whispers. “Happy Birthday”

Sehun smiles as he feels Baekhyun let go of him. He could feel that he’s been left in the middle of somewhere. He could feel he’s stepping on grass. He feels a bit anxious, it’s the first time Luhan has done something like this. It was exciting but scary at the same time.

 

“Ah, ah, is this thing on?” Luhan was tapping on the microphone he was holding. “Hi Sehunnie, you can take off your blindfolds now.”

Sehun immediately pulls the thing down and sees himself standing in the middle of what seems to be a soccer field. It dawns on him a second after that it’s the soccer field of their old high school.

He squints his eyes from the light that was on him and sees Luhan a couple of meters away from him standing on a thing that looks like a stage.

He tries to walk forward.

“Stop!” Luhan says. Sehun immediately froze. “Don’t walk up to me, just stay there. No wait, go back. A little further. Perfect.” Luhan grins.

Sehun could hear the speakers twitching a bit and the screen behind Luhan begins to work. Luhan was projected on the screen to let Sehun have a clearer look at him.

“Can you see me now?” Luhan asks, tiptoeing so he could see Sehun from all the light. “Goddamit Minseok easy with the light will you, I’m going blind here.” The bright white light on Sehun was now changed to a dim orange one. “Thank you. So can you see me now?” Sehun raises a thumbs up to which Luhan nods.

“Well, I know you’re questioning yourself what’s with all the shit that’s happening, so allow me to explain.”

Suddenly all the lights went off and Sehun started panicking for a bit. Then music starts playing and Sehun could recognize what it was.

 

_*Can’t count the years on one hand that we’ve been together*_

The lights were on the stage where Luhan was standing.

_*I need the other one to hold you, make you feel, make you feel better*._

He was starting to bop his head around. Sehun was stopping himself from laughing. He missed how Luhan dances even though he can’t to save his life.

_*It’s not a walk in the park to love each other.*_

He watched Luhan take over the stage that he didn’t notice Baekhyun walking up to him with a lily. He hands it to him and Luhan was already grinning.

_*But when our fingers interlock, you can’t deny, can’t deny, you with it.*_

Then Chanyeol followed after handing him another one.

_*‘Cause after all these time, I’m still into you.*_

Kyungsoo follows.

_*I should be over all the butterflies, but I’m into you*_

Jongin follows and Sehun just had to punch him lightly for lying to him today.

_*And baby even on our worst nights, I’m into you*_

Sehun immediately notices that the stage was already empty.

_*Let them wonder how we got this far, cause I don’t really need to wonder at all.*_

He was looking around for Luhan when suddenly a pair of hands were laced on his waist.

“Yeah after all these time, I’m still into you.”

Luhan gave him a quick kiss when Sehun rotates to hug him properly. The loud cheers of their friends made Sehun blush so much. He was hiding his face over the flowers they gave him.

“What are all of these? You make me love you too much.” Sehun says, breaking the hug. Luhan made sure to shoo their friends away.

“I just wanted to say Happy Birthday really.” Luhan grins. “I’m just thankful you were born okay.”

“But to go through all of these, hyung” Sehun’s eyes were starting to get watery.

“You deserve it. I think this really isn’t enough actually.” Luhan says.

“But why the soccer field though?” Sehun asks, wiping off the tears in his eyes.

“Remember that time Jongin introduced you to me?” Sehun nods. “I was bugging him for a while to let me get to know you.” Luhan confesses.

“Huh?” Sehun tilts his head a little. “But I was the one doing that.”

“Nope, me too. I guess you weren’t the only one that had a big crush on someone.” Luhan grins.

 “But seriously hyung, everything is like a lot to take in. I thought you were going to propose or something, I was so anxious.”

“Well do you want me to?” Luhan grins.

“Right now? I should be the one doing that” Sehun smiles back.

(Sehun ended up popping the question when they got back to their apartment. He placed the small velvet box on Luhan’s side of the bed while the latter was changing his clothes. Luhan gaped at him before proceeding to open the box. He made a face when he saw it was empty. Sehun turned around and showed him his finger that had two rings on it. Luhan gladly launched himself to Sehun muttering a thousand yes to the question Sehun haven’t asked yet. It was already given Luhan would agree in a heartbeat anyways.)

 

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

 

 

The thing is, Sehun has practically a million reasons why he loves Luhan, but at the back of his mind he knows there’s only one that makes him love Luhan every day more than yesterday.

 

“Hey, it stopped raining.” Sehun mutters, gladly patting Luhan’s cheeks.

“Hmm? Already?” Luhan groans, tryin to sit up. “What time is it?”

Sehun glances on the little pororo wall clock hanging on the wall. Kyungsoo gave them that one as a gift.

“Just a little past 2pm.” Sehun says, standing up and grabbing a coat. “We should go out.”

 

It’s just that after all those different reasons that he has listed down. Everything can just be narrowed done into simpler means.

 

“Yes we should.” Luhan grabs his phone and his coat on the bed.

Sehun was already out the door.

“Sehun” Luhan called.

Sehun peaks in. “Yes?”

 

He stays in love, because he wants to be.

 

“Happy 8th anniversary” Luhan grins.

 

Because Luhan is the main reason why he stays in love every single day.

 

“And happy 1st wedding anniversary.” Sehun smiles and puts out his hand for Luhan to take, which the latter happily holds on to.

 

And that’s the only reason he’ll ever need for the rest of his life.

 

 

 

 

 

END


End file.
